1. writing
2. sitting and talking (over a cup or glass of something)
3. (a distant 3rd) walking and talking
I've never been very interested in "doing things for fun" (besides talking) with people.
That's changing.
This year a Family Member and I fell out and didn't talk to each other for 6 months. When we talked again, pretty quickly I felt the same old resentments. I finally, way belatedly, realized something:
some relationships are not best served by talking. I want to be in Family Member's life, but I don't think we should talk so much.
But what things do people do (that I might enjoy) besides sit and talk?
***If you know or can think of good things to do, please let me know. Really. I need help!
This is not my area of comfort, so this Saturday morning I dropped into the Captain Kirk Academy for the Pursuit of Excellence--they have a 24/7 drop-in center just for this sort of thing--and came up with a list of some stuff we might DO together instead.
A lot of these are still pretty wordy, but I guess that's OK.
THINGS FAMILY MEMBER (and others) AND I MIGHT DO TOGETHER
(These are mostly local things, of course.)
1. Attend (don't have to perform!) Spoken Word Open Mic Night w/ Tish Jones * (I saw her perform last week--she was great!) at South City Café--a friendly coffee shop on Chicago and 34th.
Free! Next ones: Fridays Dec 3rd and Dec 17th, 7-9pm
2. Get henna hand-arm tattoos (temporary) at the Somali mall (Suuqa Karmel). Only $10!
Pictures of the process on a local blog.
3. Use the free passes from the library to visit all sorts of museums,
like the Swedish Institute. Their Christmas exhibits are up until Jan. (Museum Hours: Tues., Thurs., Fri., Sat., 12-4 p.m.; Wed. 12-8 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m.)
4. See the current Native American Art exhibit at the Mpls. Institute of Art (Damn. Museum's free, but this exhibit costs $8).
5. Take a Walk with Our Cameras---a photographing outing, maybe in downtown Saint Paul (because I rarely go there). We'd each snap shots--it'd be fun to compare what we've captured! We could blog them... or not.
6. bink and I went to the North West Fur Post this summer--a Minnesota Historical Society site--and it was a blast! It'd be fun to go to some of the other Historical Society sites and events.
Like...
Hill House Holidays, Saint Paul. Fee: $10 adults
8. Go see retrospective films at the Trylon and the Heights--they put together great old-film fests. Now: Charlie Chaplin. Coming up (Jan-Feb): Hard-Boiled Bogart!
9. Write an article for the Twin Cities Daily Planet newspaper. (But not until after I'm done writing my book...)
They hold classes for citizen journalists every Wednesday: 1:30, at the TC Daily Planet offices, 2600 Franklin Ave. E., #2., Minneapolis.
10. Go outdoors, in new ways.
Midwest Weekends wrote a list of "20 things that will make you fall in love with snow season."
I'm thinking less along the lines of going dog sledding and more along the lines going to see trumpeter swans in Monticello.
______________
* Tish Jones performing "Silence" at Up in Arms, a benefit concert for the family of Fong Lee, who was killed by a Minneapolis Police officer in 2007.
I'm pretty sure this isn't something you'd go for - in fact I am sure - but roller coasters are the fastest way to bond. And there's no talking.
ReplyDelete"Scared?" I asked the girl next to me; we were strapped in waiting for ride to start.
"Naw. I do crazy shit like this all the time."
"Well I'm terrified."
30 seconds later we're screaming all hell and her hair's everywhere. In 2 minutes we formed an understanding.
(WFS is in my house making a sandwich again; he's looking over my shoulder and saying with ham in his mouth, "It's like making love! Tell'er it's like making love!")
It doesn't have to be a coaster, though; I think you could get the same effect, Fresk, by simply screaming together. But then, you're in the city . . . where do you go to scream? Plenty of places to scream out here; no one will even open a window.
There's this place 20 miles down the highway called - no kidding - "Hole in the Ground"; it's this giant cavity in the ground, and if you stand in the pit of it and yell, the sound only makes it 3ft from your mouth before it dies.
Tell you what:
you and FM come here to Hole in the Ground and just scream for a while. It helps if you're genuinely afraid, so I'll put on a full body cougar suit and make some arrangements. (My neighbor has this chainsaw, and--) Every once in a while I'll click my back paws together and this is how you'll know it's me and not a real cougar.
In turn, I'll come to Minneapolis and scream just for the glee of getting a public reaction. You probably won't want to accompany me on this outing.
If you agree to this exchange, say nothing.
ps
ReplyDeletewonderfully sufficient macro
Do some knitting together!
ReplyDeleteHey! i know you never hear/see from me here anymore..but, i just haveta chime in quicklike to say:
ReplyDeleteIf Margaret ever does get over this way, can we puhleeesze all go screaming together--do ya remember our old days of screaming back in the Big Red House?! I think I remember even that family member of yours screaming and shrieking there, on occasion. (Think I'll skip the rollercoaster adventure, tho')
I recommend bowling for a cheapish thing to do. Usually too noisy in the lanes to get much talking done.
Ancient Traders Art Gallery up on Franklin and 13th Aves is a great place and it's free --or useta be.
Massage--you could massage each other or go somewhere to a massage school or Aveda School and each get massaged by strangers. Usually end up pretty nonverbal after body work.
Love and laughter!
Stefalala
The MIA doesn't charge for the Native American show on Sundays, I believe. And movies are a great way to be together without having to talk!
ReplyDeletePlay some board games or cards with each other.
ReplyDeleteMake art together (you are great at that!).
Volunteer/help others together.
Take a community ed class together.
A yoga class (I know fm does that -sliding fee scale at my yoga studio in the Wedge, One Yoga).
Ice skating?
Snow shoeing?
kate g.
Take a drawing (or some other) class together.
ReplyDeletesome felting...is like meditation
ReplyDeletescrabble
and all above
the rolercoaster made me smile the most!
Yes, rollercoasters and fun fairs in general. I'd love to go there. :)
ReplyDeleteI LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you all for these great ideas.
I'm thinking, screaming while knitting at a bowling alley should do it!
Please please tape your screaming knit-in and post it here. These are great.
ReplyDeleteI think you are so right though. There are some people worth having in one's life but not to talk with.
Riding a bike can be convenient. No conversation required.