Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Live Alone and Like It

At Jill's wedding ^ Maura, bink, and me

Oh, dear. I'd forgotten that conversational style so common among the males of my species: not asking questions
Chatting with men at the wedding reminded me. 
If a person over fifty hasn't learned (for whatever reason) how to make social chat by asking questions such as, 
"So... you a friend of the bride or the groom?" they may be an altogether lovely person, but we would not be happy together, 
my conversational style being  . . .
*googles "conversation styles"*
. . . here we go:
elaborate and personal.

I'd like somebody to love, yes, but I'm going to focus on living alone well, like I used to.


Review of Live Alone and Like It: here
["Her core message remained the same. Independence was something women needed to declare and fight for throughout their lives."


Zhoen said...

Not just men, I'm no good at it either. I fear being intrusive or pushy, so I don't ask questions. And so seem cold and oblivious. Probably why I don't have close female friends. Not to mention I'd lose on Jeopardy!

You all look lovely.

The Crow said...

So, I'm an "extra woman"? Huh!

While I miss the companionship and intimacy (physical and emotional) of a loving relationship, I like living alone. Wouldn't mind a "friend with benefits," but I wouldn't want us to share a domicile on a permanent basis.

(What the hell is an extra woman, anyhow?)

deanna said...

Great picture! You are beautiful people.

I'm coming up against the thought of an empty nest. It's something I dreamed about for years, but now...the loneliness looms. Yet I do crave solitude in measured doses. My husband is around at times, and the two of us will likely one day have to learn to share space more often...everything is an adjustment.

poodletail said...

Wonderful photo of 3 of my favorite humans on earth.

Fresca said...

Heh, maybe we're opposites:
you don't have close women friends, and I don't have close men friends (usually)... except if the friendship started in writing (e-mails and blogs).

And I've been told I can be "too intense" and come on too much like an interviewer---though not so much at midlife-- I've softened with time (or, possibly, lost some of my keen interest in people... they've started to seem quite similar).

For me, blogs have been a great way to form friendships that might have been harder to start in person, since blogging doesn't depend on asking questions: each blogger says as much as s/he wants to say.
It's like a parallel conversational style that can work really well. I like this a lot.

CROW: I know! "Extra woman"! What the...?
Actually, from reviews I've read (I added a link to the post), it looks like the book is quite sensible. Maybe I'll see if I can find it at the library.

A friend with benefits would be great, especially if the benefits included washing the dishes! :)

I think I'll relish living alone again, once I've gotten over the shock and loss, but I do want to socialize more again--I've gotten a bit too reclusive.

DEANNA: That ever-shifting balance of solitude and togetherness, nourishing solitude and withering loneliness... it's an art! Let us practice, practice, practice...

POODLE: Hey, thanks for dropping in!