Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Vid #3: Kirk: "To His Mistress..."

Eighteen (18).
Or was it nineteen?
That's the answer to how many women Captain Kirk kissed on Star Trek, out of 79 episodes (if you count the times his body kissed someone but he wasn't in it). But I may have missed some, because I was only looking at episodes I remembered kisses in, and later I realized I'd missed a couple, so had to add them and reconfigure all the timing on iMovie. AAaaaargh.

YouTube hasn't uploaded the still for my latest (third) fanvid yet. Right now (5:18 p.m., CST), it displays a silhouette of a camera-- but the vid itself IS up, and it's both silly and sultry (siltry? sully?):

(Star Trek) Kirk: "To His Mistress...".

It's an expansion (major!) of the "Metaphysical Quickie" gugeo post I did the other night, which took me less than an hour. The vid took, well, I wish I'd kept count. Many hours. Many lots of hours.
Spent futzing with the timing, mostly, in this movie, to get everything aligned right--the addition of sound is something I never had to worry about before, in my old words-and-pix days.

It's such a fascinating and satisfying, albeit nerve-racking, process, learning how to make these vids. Sister said it's like learning a new language: you start out knowing nothing and after a couple weeks, you can say,
"Je voudrais un cheval du fromage."
(That means, "I would like a cheese horse." I think.)

I very much feel as if I'm in another country, these past couple weeks since I started making these iMovies. I wake up in the middle of the night with that sense of displacement you get in a hotel room on another continent, that slight delay before you know where and who you are.

Metaphysical jet lag, you could call it.

I'm going to go look up some of my old favorites (on youTube), the ones that remind me who I am. Like Moonstruck.
(Just did it and posted my favorite part--the one the entire Basilica seems able to quote from heart.)


Here are the description notes I wrote for youTube:

Kirk's omnivorous appetite relishes sweet and savory and everything in between--and plenty of it; but what I love best about the captain is his smirk.

Donne (pronounced "done") would have approved Kirk's naughty use of his poem---his objection here is to the way Kirk is slaughtering his meter.

*The music is "The Stripper," by Daniel Rose, who wrote it for a TV show in 1958. No wonder it fits Star Trek so well.

*Paramount owns Star Trek. My intentions are entirely frivolous, er, educational.
(May blessings rain on for screencaps. And my friends who listen to me rant.)

*Portrait of John Donne as a young lover (c.1595), by an unknown painter; National Portrait Gallery, London. (But I didn't use their copyrighted image.)

John Donne (c. 1572-1631), metaphysical poet—(like Andrew Marvell, of "The Definition of Love")--and Anglican priest is known for his early love poems and his later spiritual ones: for instance, "no man is an island."

Here's the complete poem, by, of course, the young Donne:


Come, madam, come, all rest my powers defy,
Until I labor, I in labor lie.
The foe oft-times having the foe in sight,
Is tired with standing though he never fight.
Off with that girdle, like heaven's zone glistering,
But a far fairer world encompassing.

Unpin that spangled breastplate which you wear,
That th' eyes of busy fools may be stopped there.
Unlace yourself, for that harmonious chime
Tells me from you that now it is bed time.
Off with that happy busk, which I envy,
That still can be, and still can stand so nigh.

Your gown, going off, such beauteous state reveals,
as when from flowry meads th' hill's shadow steals.
Off with that wiry coronet and show
The hairy diadem which on you doth grow:
Now off with those shoes, and then safely tread
In this love's hallowed temple, this soft bed.

In such white robes, heaven's angels used to be
Received by men; thou, Angel, bring'st with thee
A heaven like Mahomet's Paradise; and though
Ill spirits walk in white, we easily know
By this these angels from an evil sprite:
Those set our hairs on end, but these our flesh upright.

License my roving hands, and let them go
Before, behind, between, above, below.
O my America! my new-found-land,
My kingdom, safeliest when with one man manned,
My mine of precious stones, my empery,
How blest am I in this discovering thee.

To enter in these bonds is to be free;
Then where my hand is set, my seal shall be.
Full nakedness! All joys are due to thee,
As souls unbodied, bodies unclothed must be
To taste whole joys. Gems which you women use
Are like Atlanta's balls, cast in men's views,

That when a fool's eye lighteth on a gem,
His earthly soul may covet theirs, not them.
Like pictures, or like books' gay coverings made
For lay-men, are all women thus arrayed;
Themselves are mystic books, which only we
(Whom their imputed grace will dignify)

Must see revealed. Then, since that I may know,
As liberally as to a midwife, show
Thyself: cast all, yea, this white linen hence,
There is no penance due to innocence. To teach thee, I am naked first; why than,
what needst thou have more covering than a man?


ddip said...

What a hoot! great job. (You could also call this one "Enough about Me, Let's Talk about ME!")

Manfred Allseasons said...

You made me laugh at work!

Something I thought I would never do!

The best yet. I hesitate to use the word 'genius'...but....

bink said...

You have definitely risen to the top as a creator of Star Trek fanvids. I see universal aclaim coming your way...Mars, Saturn, Vulcun, Aurois's being posted all through the stratosphere. To think that mere weeks ago you had never made an iMovie...and now you rank with the best!

What a great laugh...every time I see it...over and over again.

fresca said...

Sister: Too true! That little Kirk smirk I love so much is all about "I am so fantastic."
In real life, people like that are a bore, but this isn't real life. Thank god.

So, where do you work?
Your profile says you're a Brit in government, and now we know you don't laugh at work... Your real name isn't... Gordon, is it? Charles?

Aw, go ahead and say it: Shatner IS a genius!

Actually, the funny thing is, when I *finally* (aargh!) got the tiny little "fwoomp" in synch with the still of Kirk lifting the red shirt of the crewman redshirt--a noise which I expect no one will ever consciously notice, on an image I set to flash quickly--the thought did indeed cross my mind that I was a bloody genius, yes indeed.

It crossed my mind and kept on going, but there was that very satisfying moment...

Bink: Thanks! I laughed when I watched it again today too! I'm going to go all Kirk on you, smirking with delight at my own work.
But really, I am extremely pleased with this video. All glory to the folks who made Star Trek--especially whoever made that bikini made out of space tin foil.

Manfred Allseasons said...

erm...I work in employment legislation enforcement, but the reason I dont laugh is the quality of the jokes, viz:

A man goes into a restaurant with a salmon under his arm. After examining the menu, he asks the waiter if he serves fish cakes.

The waiter says no.

The man says: Thats a pity, because its his birthday.

I know... terrible. sorry!

I am loathe to tear aside the internet veil, as I have seen The Wizard of Oz, but I am no Gordon or Charles - though born in London, my parents were Irish...

Yeah, I think Shatner is a genius just for Has Been, one of my favourite albums! You must have it of course...

fresca said...

All jokes are bad, aren't they? Mostly?
I almost never like jokes--they are too often not humor, they are manipulation. Yeah, I'm tetchy, but that's how it feels to me when people barrage me with them.

Having said that, I guess that was a joke I made about Gordon, not an actual attempt to get you to reveal your True Identity.

I actually had a bit of trouble not being anonymous on my last blog, and ended up taking it down, so I'm all for the curtain.

I don't have "Has Been"--friends had to sit on me to get me to listen to it (Shatner outside of Kirk usually makes me cringe), and then I loved it.
Somewhere back on this blog I write about my favorite "Can't Get Behind That". Especially that bit about what's the point of gods being omnipotent [if they can't take a joke?, as it were].

And now: The Weekend!

Bookworm said...

This is, as my son and his friends would say "awesome"! Beautifully put together and hugely entertaining.

By the way - is the phrase "What am I - Chopped liver?" common in the US? I only know it from the UK series "Spaced" with Jessica Stevenson and Simon Pegg (do you know this - it's brilliant and well worth watching for its use of filming, editing techniques and use of music).

Anyway - keep going with the films!

fresca said...

Hi, Bookworm!
Thanks! I'm glad it translates across the ocean and everything!
(I miss your blog posts, btw.)

Here's a fun fact: Simon Pegg, whom I only know from his movies, Shaun and Fuzz, (but now can't wait to check out on this TV show "Spaced"), will be playing the young Scotty in the forthcoming new Star Trek movie.

I didn't know the origin of the chopped liver complaint, which I've rarely heard anyone actually say-- rather old fashioned I think--so I knew it was a bit of a stretch for Uhura to use this dated Jewish saying, but who knows what slangy stuff will survive into the 23rd cent?!

I looked the phrase up and found this answer on Ask the Rabbi:
"As far as I know, the origins of the phrase are not Yiddish; I believe the phrase was originally coined in America. Being that chopped liver was always considered a side dish and not a main course, the phrase is used to express hurt and amazement when a person feels he has been overlooked and treated just like a "side dish."