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Wednesday, December 6, 2023

Bouillon Cup, & the presumption of good

“Etiquette requires the presumption of good
until the contrary is proven.” 
– Emily Post

___________________

I. Soup on the Rails

The mysteries of thrift! 
I brought home this double-handed cup, because the (defunct) Soo Line railway was based here in Minneapolis. 
I thought it was for drinking coffee on lurching trains, but bink informed me two handles = bouillon cup.


I was dubious, but she's right. From Emily Post’s “Etiquette”:

“Soup at luncheon is never served in soup plates, but in two-handled cups. It is eaten with a teaspoon or a bouillon spoon [ital mine], or after it has cooled sufficiently, the cup may be picked up.
It is almost always a clear soup: in the winter, a bouillon, turtle soup, or consommé, and in the summer, a chilled soup such as jellied consommé or madrilène.”
--From My Auction Finds

A bouillon spoon? NOW I NEED A BOUILLON SPOON!

And, from "Emily Post Etiquette" on substack:

 

The Soo Line wasn't primarily a passenger service. According to the MN Historical Society, it carried grain and timber thru the upper Midwest and connected with the Canadian Pacific (CP) Railway. 
On Soo + CP, you could travel from Mpls. to Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan [via]. I wish we still could.

The co. formed in 1888 as the Minneapolis, St. Paul & Sault Ste. Marie Railway Company--M.St.P.&S.S.M.--known as the Soo Line––after the phonetic spelling of 'Sault'.

I see cups like mine on railway-collectibles sites for $35. 
I paid 49¢ . . . because we know nothing and don't care.

II. Off the Rails

I feel alone at work.
I miss Ass't Man, I realized yesterday. I think that's underlying me feeling blue lately.
Ass't Man was kinda my work husband, and even though it was a bad marriage, we shared a good love:
we both delighted in and were curious about thrift--and no one else does.
(Not entirely true-- Clothes Alice loves vintage clothes and textiles, and I appreciate that.)

I'm still glad Ass't Man divorced himself from me and the store a couple months ago.
I wish it had been otherwise though. I wish that when I'd told him I was uncomfortable about what he did and said when drunk that he'd said, "I need to do--am going to do--something about my drinking", instead of what he did say: "You are the problem."

But that's what he did say, and then he quit, and that's the way it went.
You presume good until the contrary is proven.
And when it's proven, it behooves you to believe it. But that doesn't mean you're not sad about it.
You can't take the train from
Mpls. to Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, anymore either.

I feel better admitting to myself that I am sad about it.

6 comments:

  1. That truly is addict speak…your problem, nothing wrong with me-how dare you! Yes I have known a few and it is sad when they choose addiction over relationship. Dang, poop.
    I love your little cup/bowl.Railroad anything warms my
    nostalgia to a comfortable temperature. I come from a railroad town, a railroad family, something that I will be all of my days…a railroader! Biden promised to bring back the trains….

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LINDA SUE—that’s what I said in frustration to AM:
      “you sound like an alcoholic “—
      Probably helped him decide to leave…

      Growing up, I lived a couple miles from rail yards—they always seemed magic to me.
      Toot toot!!!

      Delete
  2. AM needed to be told, and even more to hear, that he is an alcoholic. Sometimes being told repeatedly eventually gets the point across, so I don't think your caring words were wasted, more that they are be part of an additive message that hopefully will eventually penetrate.

    And railroad china, how exciting. There was (maybe still is?) a wonderful display of special dining car china at the Baltimore & Ohio train museum in Baltimore, and I even remember the bullion cups.

    I'm enjoying reading your archives occasionally, as well as the contemporaneous ones.

    Ceci

    ReplyDelete
  3. PS. To be fair, AM knew he was alcoholic and was worried about it. (I’ve written about that in earlier posts.)
    I have compassion for that,
    but drew the line, finally…

    I would love to see the return of trains!!! ❤️

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree that AM needs to be told, in a clear and direct fashion, that he has an issue with alcohol. Whether he chooses to hear it or not is on him. As the adult child of two alcoholics, pussyfooting around the truth doesn't help anybody. And too often people stay silent when they should speak up.

    I LOVE the cup! What a find!

    ReplyDelete
  5. CECI: Thanks for commenting. When I was a kid I'd have thought the idea of going to a B&O railway museum the boringest thing ever. Now I'd happily go on my own!

    SUSAN: Hi! Thanks for commenting. I don't think I've met you before? Introduce yourself a little, if you would--
    I love to know who's here.

    Sounds like you might be speaking of alcohol from experience?
    Oddly, I have not had much experience of it--if I had, I'd have recognized the need for good boundaries with AM a lot sooner (I think).

    Good news about CA trains!

    JENNIFER! Nice to see you! I ate ice cream out of the cup last night--perfect!
    I appreciate you sharing your own experience w/ alcoholic parents (sorry you and they had that experience, though)--
    it makes me feel more confident that I did the right thing, even though it didn't "work". Who knows if, as Ceci suggests, it might be one of several experiences that does.

    ReplyDelete