I write like
David Foster Wallace
David Foster Wallace
I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!
While I know this is a ridiculous comparison--based, I'm guessing, on my use of lots of parentheses and dashes?--and possibly even insulting (read, "convoluted and digressive")--not to mention generated by a machine that serves a commercial, not artistic, interest, nonetheless I now have a little genius halo glowing around my head.
MacArthur grant people?
Over here!
PART TWO
And then I submitted a boring chunk of pedantic hogwash, written for work at a 7th-grade reading level, and the analyzer told me I write like Dan Brown.
Bingo!
Try it and let me know who the machine says you write like.
I posted the beginning of a short story I wrote and got the David Foster Wallace badge. Then I posted one of my blog entries and received a William Gibson badge. I haven't read much of either. Maybe I should, but glad there was no Dan Brown (even with all his money).
ReplyDeleteDear god. I put in a blog post and was told James Joyce.
ReplyDeleteAfter it brought me Stephen King, I became furious and, midst much weeping and gnashing of teeth, hammered out the first nonsense that came to mind:
ReplyDeleteYour mother is a computer; your father a hairless mole.
What does that make you?
A fly. No, THE fly.
And I'm not even kidding you:
William Shakespeare
OMG.
ReplyDeleteI just entered a lengthy excerpt from Shatners autobiography;
Margaret Atwood!
I entered a letter written to my nephew when he was in jail:
ReplyDeleteDavid Foster Wallace
What do you make of that?
Hahahahahaha! I pasted in some Shakespeare, it said Shakespeare. I pasted in some James Joyce, it said... Leo Tolstoy!
ReplyDeleteWhen I submitted a very clearly written piece of work, I was told I write like James Joyce. When I submitted some nonsense writing (remember the 'write your own pope book' using all "a" words?) I was told I write like Kurt Vonnegut!
ReplyDeleteThe really sad thing though is the writing I was looking to submit--my big B mystery--has mysteriously disappeared. I hadn't been able to find it on my desktop recently, so I did a very exacting search today... and poof!!!... no where to be found. I'm baffled.
I put in the first page of my book for children and it gave me Vladimir Nabokov - disturbing!
ReplyDeleteBookworm
I'm yet another James Joyce....but I'm not! ...I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day....
ReplyDeleteHeh!
Oh! All these responses were fun. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteDANIA: Yes, if only my work writing brought in the bucks, like Dan Brown's...
RR: So, if you write like Joyce and Joyce writes like Tolstoy (!), then you write like Tolstoy!
M'RET: Ah, yes, one of Shakespeare's great Fly sonnets.
Margaret Atwood & Shatner = 2 great Canadian writers.
POODLE: I realize I don't really know you as a writer. (Do you use a lot of parentheses?)
BINK: Oh, too bad about your lost work. You must rally like Carlyle and write the thing again. (Hopefully it's not as long as his burned-up history of the French Revolution.)
BOOKWORM: Nabokov for children. I can't imagine!
MANFRED: As long as it wasn't Ezra Pound, eh?
The problem with this, of course, is there is no "you don't write like anybody important" response. I wrote:
ReplyDelete"Hi. How are you? I am fine. Later!"
It said I write like Hemingway!!!
Well, LEE, Hemingway seems spot on to me.
ReplyDeleteH. P. Lovecraft.
ReplyDelete"American literature's greatest bad writer."
sigh.
BIANCA: I've never read Lovecraft, but you are a GOOD writer!
ReplyDeleteI got Stephen King and I can live with that, to be honest. :) I'm sure the general lack of hyphens, parentheses and extra clauses doomed me to my fate. Though I will never match King's standards as he insists on a strict ban on adverbs. I cannot do this, she asserts mournfully.
ReplyDeleteI entered one random blog writing, although since I am a new blogger, my randomness is limited, and I got Kurt Vonnegut. It's a fun delusion of writing ability.
ReplyDeleteI tried this a few days ago, submitting 5 of my blog posts: Stephen King twice, James Joyce, Margaret Atwood and Mario Puzo.
ReplyDeleteHah!
THANKS, all! These are fun!
ReplyDelete