Wednesday, February 8, 2012
UnPremeditated Reading in Bed
Marz and Frex, Reading in Bed
MARZ: How sad, then, that fish can't read!
FREX: What? Because of the way the comforter looks like the ocean?
MARZ: What? No. I was just using nonsense as a starter, because I didn't know what to say. You always start this.
FREX: No I don't.
MARZ: Well, I don't.
[singing to the C-W radio in the background:
"There's bubble gum in the baby's hair,
Sweet potato in the lazy chair...
...It's only Monday, Mr. Mom."
FREX: Let's tell the peeples what we're reading.
MARZ: I'm reading Lucky Jim and you're reading ... I don't know. This and that. Bully? Acts of Worship?
FREX: Don't you remember what I was reading?
MARZ: Oh, I thought you meant I was going to say what I was reading, and then you were going to say what YOU were reading. I didn't want to speak for you. You're an adult...and not even a vulnerable adult.
You were reading Hillary, 30 Essays on a Woman with Hair.
FREX: Thirty Views on Hillary--a collection of essays about Clinton. But, yeah, her hair does come into it.
Speaking of which, her hair...
MARZ: It's unacceptable for a woman, to have that ugly haircut.
FREX: I don't usually care, but
MARZ: I was joking!
FREX: Yeah but, no but, really... her long hair lately makes her look like some sort of Indonesian mad woman shadow puppet!
MARZ: But before when she had short hair, people criticized her for trying to be a man.
FREX: Yeah, she can't win, which is part of what comes up in this book.
How are you liking Lucky Jim? He'd HATE Hillary!
MARZ: I like it. It's not very funny.
FREX: What if you were a fish? What would you think?
MARZ: Now why d'you have to complicate it like that?
If I was a fish...
I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW HOW FISH THINK.
And I don't know how people stuck in this tight class system in England think either.
Basically he's in this unwanted situation from every direction, but it's not a tragedy, it's supposed to be funny.
It is funny.
But not always.
But it's not tragic either because you don't like Jim a lot. You're sympathetic, but not to the point of wishing him good fortune at the expense of a boring book.
And he's fine.
He's not going to go jump off a bridge. He would just blow up at all these awful people in his life.
FREX: Oh. You haven't finished it yet.
FREX: I think it does have a satisfactory ending. Tho I'd probably skip to the end... skip some of the center part.
MARZ: Now, you talk.
FREX: What? Ask me a question.
MARZ: OK. Uh....uh...uh... uh...
[laughs] Oh no.
Um. I can think of a question, but it's terrible.
If you had to be responsible for the death of a gorgeous blue whale or an extremely old person, why would you do a thing like that?
FREX: What? Shouldn't that be an either/or question?
MARZ: It's a trick.
FREX: OK. So... Hillary kills old people. No, wait. She is responsible for saving old people on the backs of blue whales.
FREX: I just mean, she's either to blame for everything, or she's a mythic hero.
Shall we wrap this up and go out for lunch?
MARZ: Yes. I could eat a whale.
NO! I would never do something like that!
FREX: No. Let's go to Jasmine and eat mock duck.
But, should we say something about the photo? Like, people will think we're sweeties cause we're in bed together?
MARZ: No, they won't.
MARZ: Oh, they know. Solomon says, "If two lie down together... they are warm. But how can one be warm alone?" Ecclesiastes 4:11.
FREX: Is that really the citation?
MARZ: Yeah, I remember.
FREX: There you have it. God loves us. God wants us to be warm.